One Day at a Time: Just a Piece of Plastic

Rest the night prior occurred better than expected. Anticipation increased as the hours neared. Confidence plummeted when imagining the event. Nervous feelings swarmed at rapid speeds throughout my gut.

I trained for the past few months for such the event. I put in countless hours building every part of the body to endure such the event. My physical body was capable – ready – willing to complete such the event. My mind, on the other hand, began working diligently to tear down the strength built up over the past months.

Regardless of emotion, time would not stand still and the day arrived. Morning of, I arose just as every other morning. I recited over and over that such event does not determine my worth. The results do not define me. Life means much more than physical strength. I am not judged by successes here on Earth. God loves me then, now and post event as well – regardless of outcome.

My son came along with goals to accomplish as well. He encouraged this old lady, helped in preparation and provided a post event date that meant the world to me. The event? A 10k for me and 4-mile run for my son. The cost provided support for beautiful children taken way too soon. The purpose went much further for me. Recovering from an eating disorder and all the emotions feeding such behaviors has been the most difficult mountain to climb. During ascension, confidence grows only to be taken down by one comment, one event or one disappointment. Slippage brings condemnation.

What I discovered over the years, filled with slip after slip, is that God catches me every time. He adjusts the harness, steadies the rock and places my foot perfectly to avoid the same slip. He always provides! This day was no different than any other. Yes, I pushed my body to capacity while running several miles; but, God stood unchanged.

I look at the trophy earned that day: Where will it be in a year? Where will it be when I breathe my last breath? Will I carry it around for all to see? Will it provide an introduction to who I am for strangers? Does this trophy hold any value whatsoever? I think you can easily answer all these questions for me.

The race was not about the prize. I soon will forget the victory, length of time or physical exertion occurring on that day. I will remember every step taken that day. I will remember the cool breeze provided around mile 3.6. I will remember the prayers answered, encouragement from others, the final stretch when I prayed for His angels to push me to the end and steps increased in speed. I will remember the strength provided to endure so many miles of running. This strength displays recovery from a once frail body unable to withstand walking even just one flight of stairs. This strength displays how much power God holds over our enemy. God won the battle; yet, for years I thought I still needed to overcome the enemy through fleshly strength.

Does it feel good to win a race and earn a trophy? Well, yes, of course! But, the real prize that day will last years longer than a piece of plastic. This moment marked another story along the journey to share of the goodness of God. He provides, matures and stands firm through any situation. He never leaves nor forsakes. He brings healing and more than we can ever imagine. He is our Savior. I praise Him. I stand in unspeakable appreciation for the mountain He helped me climb in recovery! Each day, I place on the harness of His Truth which protects, leads and encourages each step on the mountains of this life.